Cut It Short ;
HERRO LOVELIES.
Omg ok so i got my hair cut today and it probably won't make a difference to the guys but i hope that my ladies out there actually see a difference so i won't feel like it was insignificant because i think i heard my heart break when the aunty chopped my hair off. T.T
It's not alot but ya.
IT'S REALLY A GIRL THING.
I HAVE FEELINGS FOR MY LONG HURRR.
I can't help it okay.
And i really should be doing my assignments but what is this hahahah.
I have a severe lack of motivation to finish the description of my painting and typing out the lesson plan.
Screw this shit omg i think i will never survive Year 2 at this rate hahahhaha.
BUT OK.
2 ASSIGNMENTS AND I'M DONE FOR THE TERM.
I'm actually almost done with EMATH but idk why my brain refuses to stop harping on CRC.
My brain is an annoying faggot.
(Is this why Boonkiat calls me faggot. FML)
Sian. I even went back to watching pokemon LOL.
WHEN I SHOULD BE STUDYING.
This is all a sick joke played on me.
By my own brain.
I feel damn betrayed.
OK I AM GETTING SO LAME.
:c
One day.
I hope i will be the person someone is excited to wake up to.
I hope i will be the person that knows him better than anyone else in the world.
I hope i will be the person to pick out his outfits just cos he can never get up on time.
I hope i will be the person someone is willing to spend forever with.
I'm a really shitty person but i can love you really well. ;)
LIKE SERIOUS.
And this may sound very weird but i have things i always wanted to do for my future man:
1. Tie his tie
2. Make him lunchboxes
3. Wake him up with kisses in the morning
4. Surprise him at the weirdest timings with things he wanted
5. Go the distance to find him wherever he is when he has a bad day
And the list goes on and on and on...
I think i'm too clingy and overly attached and i just like to do too much for someone.
I'm afraid people will think i'm crazy or like i'm so set on him that i'll never ever let him off.
I WILL WHEN I HAVE TO.
But i do alot for people i care about.
The day doesn't have to be special for me to love you !!!
People need to understand that giving alot is not a sin.
I don't mind giving more to you than you give to me.
I don't expect anything in return though when it is reciprocated i feel more loved.
I only need some appreciation (in form of thank yous and words ok) to motivate me further to give you more.
I guess people nowadays are just too used to receiving from other people that they often forget that we can't bring our fortune to our graves.
Like no shit bruh you can scrooge all you want and just take and take and take from the people around you but they're gonna leave you sooner or later when they find out you're just calculative of your money.
MONEY CAN BE EARNED AND SAVED AGAIN.
BUT THE PEOPLE YOU LOVE MAY NOT COME BACK ONCE THEY LEAVE.
And i hope those people will never regret the fact that they treasured their wealth more than the happiness of someone they loved.
For example, buying someone's meal isn't too much. Especially when it's a special day or their meal is just like. 5 bucks ?
BUT IT MAKES A DIFFERENCE.
It will make that person smile i swear.
It's something small but it makes the person feel extremely appreciated.
I have friends who no longer calculate money with me because we all know what we do for one another goes way beyond what this money can buy.
Money can't really buy you someone who will burn in hell with you when you do some dumb shit.
Money cannot exactly buy you someone who loves all your flaws genuinely as well.
It's the small things that count and i'm very very lucky to have friends who think alike.
Trust me when i say my gifts for them are not extravagant (except on their birthdays or special occasions), and neither do they buy alot alot of things for me.
But they know i love candy and they occasionally buy me my favourite candies at my hardest times to cheer me on.
And i randomly buy their favourite chocolate to put in their exam kit.
It makes all the difference in the world to show someone you love them than just saying you do.
Some people need proof and reassurance (yes i need alot of reassurance i'm a troublesome kid).
And i consider myself lucky af to find people who show me they love me despite my every flaw.
EHEHEHEHE.
You all know who you are.
This is for you.
You people are amazing.
Especially those i've known for like forever and you still love me even though i'm an annoying piece of shit that bugs you at the weirdest timings and make you stay up and talk to me because i'm bawling my eyes out.
Especially those who've seen me cry and still hugs me even if i'll stain your shirts with tears and even though i get mad and give y'all the cold shoulder or like vent it on you by punching or kicking or pinching you.
Especially those that showers me with affection and let me cuddle all of you when i'm insecure or sad with no questions asked or whatsoever.
Especially those who can spend hours with me in silence and zero awkwardness, and those who walk me home to keep me safe even though you know no one in this world would ever survive my shitty character even if they kidnapped me and they will probably die in my hands because i'm violent as hell.
Especially those who let me complain and rant and accept all my weird ideas (and gently tell me i'm weird af), and the ones who let me give them the weirdest surprises and miss me even when i'm acting like i'm high on drugs.
Especially those who confides in me and tells me everything even though they know i could probably drop all these bombs one day but they trust i wouldn't.
Especially those that let me roam this world free of worries and shelter me from storms, and they know i could possibly leave them for a long time but they will always welcome me when i come home no matter what.
These are the people i've sworn to keep in my life and that's why i go the extra mile of doing things for them.
You may think this is all to justify my weird and spontaneous ideas (which is very possible actually) but i really do mean everything i said.
And i'm not someone who would mind spending as long as it's worth it and if it makes you happy.
BUT.
OF COURSE.
There are going to be people who will take advantage of that.
Just know that i have amazing people backing me up and you'll get hell from them if they ever found out.
(Though i will first get hell for even trusting you la)
But i hope that you people will understand why i do so much ok.
I'm not trying to be overly attached, but i want you to feel important and appreciated in my life.
I truly love you when i actually say it.
Love ya.
Joy
Omg ok so i got my hair cut today and it probably won't make a difference to the guys but i hope that my ladies out there actually see a difference so i won't feel like it was insignificant because i think i heard my heart break when the aunty chopped my hair off. T.T
IT'S REALLY A GIRL THING.
I HAVE FEELINGS FOR MY LONG HURRR.
I can't help it okay.
And i really should be doing my assignments but what is this hahahah.
I have a severe lack of motivation to finish the description of my painting and typing out the lesson plan.
Screw this shit omg i think i will never survive Year 2 at this rate hahahhaha.
BUT OK.
2 ASSIGNMENTS AND I'M DONE FOR THE TERM.
I'm actually almost done with EMATH but idk why my brain refuses to stop harping on CRC.
My brain is an annoying faggot.
(Is this why Boonkiat calls me faggot. FML)
Sian. I even went back to watching pokemon LOL.
WHEN I SHOULD BE STUDYING.
This is all a sick joke played on me.
By my own brain.
I feel damn betrayed.
OK I AM GETTING SO LAME.
:c
One day.
I hope i will be the person someone is excited to wake up to.
I hope i will be the person that knows him better than anyone else in the world.
I hope i will be the person to pick out his outfits just cos he can never get up on time.
I hope i will be the person someone is willing to spend forever with.
I'm a really shitty person but i can love you really well. ;)
LIKE SERIOUS.
And this may sound very weird but i have things i always wanted to do for my future man:
1. Tie his tie
2. Make him lunchboxes
3. Wake him up with kisses in the morning
4. Surprise him at the weirdest timings with things he wanted
5. Go the distance to find him wherever he is when he has a bad day
And the list goes on and on and on...
I think i'm too clingy and overly attached and i just like to do too much for someone.
I'm afraid people will think i'm crazy or like i'm so set on him that i'll never ever let him off.
I WILL WHEN I HAVE TO.
But i do alot for people i care about.
The day doesn't have to be special for me to love you !!!
People need to understand that giving alot is not a sin.
I don't mind giving more to you than you give to me.
I don't expect anything in return though when it is reciprocated i feel more loved.
I only need some appreciation (in form of thank yous and words ok) to motivate me further to give you more.
I guess people nowadays are just too used to receiving from other people that they often forget that we can't bring our fortune to our graves.
Like no shit bruh you can scrooge all you want and just take and take and take from the people around you but they're gonna leave you sooner or later when they find out you're just calculative of your money.
MONEY CAN BE EARNED AND SAVED AGAIN.
BUT THE PEOPLE YOU LOVE MAY NOT COME BACK ONCE THEY LEAVE.
And i hope those people will never regret the fact that they treasured their wealth more than the happiness of someone they loved.
For example, buying someone's meal isn't too much. Especially when it's a special day or their meal is just like. 5 bucks ?
BUT IT MAKES A DIFFERENCE.
It will make that person smile i swear.
It's something small but it makes the person feel extremely appreciated.
I have friends who no longer calculate money with me because we all know what we do for one another goes way beyond what this money can buy.
Money can't really buy you someone who will burn in hell with you when you do some dumb shit.
Money cannot exactly buy you someone who loves all your flaws genuinely as well.
It's the small things that count and i'm very very lucky to have friends who think alike.
Trust me when i say my gifts for them are not extravagant (except on their birthdays or special occasions), and neither do they buy alot alot of things for me.
But they know i love candy and they occasionally buy me my favourite candies at my hardest times to cheer me on.
And i randomly buy their favourite chocolate to put in their exam kit.
It makes all the difference in the world to show someone you love them than just saying you do.
Some people need proof and reassurance (yes i need alot of reassurance i'm a troublesome kid).
And i consider myself lucky af to find people who show me they love me despite my every flaw.
EHEHEHEHE.
You all know who you are.
This is for you.
You people are amazing.
Especially those i've known for like forever and you still love me even though i'm an annoying piece of shit that bugs you at the weirdest timings and make you stay up and talk to me because i'm bawling my eyes out.
Especially those who've seen me cry and still hugs me even if i'll stain your shirts with tears and even though i get mad and give y'all the cold shoulder or like vent it on you by punching or kicking or pinching you.
Especially those that showers me with affection and let me cuddle all of you when i'm insecure or sad with no questions asked or whatsoever.
Especially those who can spend hours with me in silence and zero awkwardness, and those who walk me home to keep me safe even though you know no one in this world would ever survive my shitty character even if they kidnapped me and they will probably die in my hands because i'm violent as hell.
Especially those who let me complain and rant and accept all my weird ideas (and gently tell me i'm weird af), and the ones who let me give them the weirdest surprises and miss me even when i'm acting like i'm high on drugs.
Especially those who confides in me and tells me everything even though they know i could probably drop all these bombs one day but they trust i wouldn't.
Especially those that let me roam this world free of worries and shelter me from storms, and they know i could possibly leave them for a long time but they will always welcome me when i come home no matter what.
These are the people i've sworn to keep in my life and that's why i go the extra mile of doing things for them.
You may think this is all to justify my weird and spontaneous ideas (which is very possible actually) but i really do mean everything i said.
And i'm not someone who would mind spending as long as it's worth it and if it makes you happy.
BUT.
OF COURSE.
There are going to be people who will take advantage of that.
Just know that i have amazing people backing me up and you'll get hell from them if they ever found out.
(Though i will first get hell for even trusting you la)
But i hope that you people will understand why i do so much ok.
I'm not trying to be overly attached, but i want you to feel important and appreciated in my life.
I truly love you when i actually say it.
Love ya.
Joy
Comments
Post a Comment